I AM an undergraduate in one of the universities and I’ve recently done something really terrible. My mum was a single mother of two for years until she got married to a nice widower last year. The man has just completed his house, so we all moved in with him along with the three children from his first marriage. We had the house-warming party around Christmas and we all had too much to drink. In the night my step dad came over and we made love.
My head cleared in the morning and I’ve felt horribly guilty ever since. My step dad now carries on as if nothing happened but I feel really guilty and don’t know what to do. I don’t want mum to know what happened, yet she needs to be aware of the type of maniac she is married to. Please help.
Augusta,
By e-mail.
Dear Augusta,
This is definitely a tricky situation. Your mum will definitely be hurt if you tell her what has happened. In fact, she may be so bent on defending her new found happiness she might choose to trust her new husband and not you. Your best bet is to have a heart to heart chat with your step dad. Tell him how much you love your mum and how you’ve both betrayed her trust by sleeping together. Then let him realize you’re willing to put the ugly incident behind you if he promises it won’t happen again.
Sadly, what you’ve just experienced is not new though that doesn’t make it right. If this man breaks his promise and tries again, then you’ll have no option than to tell your mum or confide in a trusted member of the family who can effectively intervene.
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